


Burn the Sky Down

by dls



Series: Would You Do It All the Same? [2]
Category: Iron Man (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Alternate Universe - Dark, Alternate Universe - Time Travel, Assassination, Brainwashing, Civil War Team Iron Man, Dark Tony Stark, Gaslighting, Gen, Infinity Gems, Kid Tony Stark, M/M, Suicide, Superhero Registration Act, Time Loop, Tony Stark Does What He Wants, Tony Stark-centric, Violence, What-If, 中文翻译 | Translation in Chinese
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-05-18
Updated: 2018-04-25
Packaged: 2018-11-02 03:16:14
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 10
Words: 14,540
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10935840
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dls/pseuds/dls
Summary: A collection of dark what-ifs based on my other workIf You Had This Time Again.Each chapter is a stand-alone depicting a path not taken. Basically, an AU of an AU.Or: Occasionally my brain goes to strange places. Sorry (but not really) about that.Ch 1: What if Tony woke up in Afghanistan...?Ch 2: What if Tony told the Avengers the truth...?Ch 3: What if Tony took control of the Winter Soldier...?Ch 4: What if Tony woke up as a small child...?Ch 5: What if Tony woke up before going to Sokovia...?Ch 6: What if Tony woke up immediately after Age of Ultron...?Ch 7: What if Tony woke up on the helicarrier...?Ch 8: What if Tony kept waking up in Siberia...?Ch 9: What if Tony woke up mid-Civil War...?Ch 10: What if Loki's scepter worked on Tony...?





	1. What if Tony woke up in Afghanistan...?

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Paranoia_shoujo](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Paranoia_shoujo/gifts), [AJM](https://archiveofourown.org/users/AJM/gifts), [WillJ](https://archiveofourown.org/users/WillJ/gifts), [TheBlueMenace](https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheBlueMenace/gifts), [izumi2](https://archiveofourown.org/users/izumi2/gifts), [EmuSam](https://archiveofourown.org/users/EmuSam/gifts), [Taeryfai](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Taeryfai/gifts), [Peramia](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Peramia/gifts), [Flight_Of_Icarus](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Flight_Of_Icarus/gifts), [Candyoranges](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Candyoranges/gifts), [lxghtwoodlxve](https://archiveofourown.org/users/lxghtwoodlxve/gifts), [Wolcen](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Wolcen/gifts), [avenge_the90s](https://archiveofourown.org/users/avenge_the90s/gifts).
  * Translation into 中文 available: [焚毁天幕](https://archiveofourown.org/works/15586452) by [allyStk](https://archiveofourown.org/users/allyStk/pseuds/allyStk)
  * Translation into Polski available: [Spopiel niebiosa](https://archiveofourown.org/works/15806676) by [Every_Moment_Matters](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Every_Moment_Matters/pseuds/Every_Moment_Matters)



> References/Quotes:   
>  Title from "Burn the Sky Down" by Emma Hewitt.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Inspired by [Paranoia_shoujo](http://archiveofourown.org/comments/107622060). (Major Character Death)
> 
> References/Quotes:   
>  _Iron Man. Avengers._

Tony fell back against the cold cement floors of the HYDRA bunker, forcibly ripping his gaze away from the darkened doorway from which Steve, carrying a half-conscious Bucky, exited. No one was coming for him. For the little rich boy playing pretend. For the arrogant bastard breezing through life. For the villain finally falling to his long overdue defeat. 

His steadily blurring vision and the crackling fissures of pain radiating from his chest made his breath catch then release in stuttered huffs, little clouds of white looking more carefree than they ought to be. Tony tracked them to the best of his abilities, following his exhales and counting his heartbeats. Tony was exhausted in ways that defied comprehension and capacity. His life was an endless cycle of failure and fatigue, one that he could not seem to escape from no matter what he tried. Oh, how he tried. 

Perhaps what he should have done was  _stop_.

Stop trying. Stop fixing. Stop  _being_. 

He destroyed everything he touched. 

The Avengers, imprisoned. 

Rhodey, paralyzed. 

JARVIS, gone.

Pepper, heartbroken. 

Yinsen, dead. 

Tony's eyes blinked close, ice clumping his lashes and frost biting his skin. Small stinging sensations that were nothing compared to his shattered heart. The only comfort was the knowledge that it would end soon.

* 

The searing agony spreading across his chest and into his bones jerked Tony back into consciousness. 

Dimly, he heard the buzzing of a saw, smelled the dry desert in the air, and tasted copper on his tongue. One voice called his attention, one he hadn't heard in years, one he shouldn't be hearing now. 

_ Yinsen _ . 

* 

Tony woke again, this time more aware of his surroundings than before. The coarse cot he was on, the muffled sounds of gunfire, and the tube lodged in his nostril. Somehow, he was back in Afghanistan. Before he was Iron Man. Before he created Ultron. Before he signed the Accords. 

Before he destroyed everything he touched. 

With a groan, he pushed himself up on an unsteady elbow and reached for the car battery with his other hand. 

"I wouldn't do that if I were you." Yinsen warned. 

Tony smiled, mirthless and hopeless and lifeless. "Actually, I would." With swift and shaky fingers, he increased the voltage and, as a result, disrupted the delicate magnetic field surrounding his heart. Pulling the pieces of deadly shrapnel in instead of holding them still. 

Yinsen reached for Tony, frantic and futile. "Stark!" 

"Sorry, Yinsen." Tony caught the other man's hand in a surprisingly strong grip. "My life is better wasted." 

* 

Four years later, waves of Chitauri troops poured through the portal atop the Empire State Building, flooding the streets with destruction and drowning the city in death. 

Captain America coordinated and assisted with evacuation efforts, his shield steadily losing its gleam as it ricocheted off of endless enemies in its effort to provide cover for the officers and civilians. 

Thor bid lightning to do his will, determinedly calling down crackling strands of electricity despite Mjolnir growing heavy in his hand, or perhaps it was his waning strength slowing his movements. 

Hawkeye covered his teammates from his perch, first with arrows then with timely warnings; he longed to join the fray but lack the movability of his enhanced teammates to cover the expanse of the city. 

The Hulk reduced Loki to a crumbled heap, uncontrollable anger from the thinly veiled mistrust and poorly disguised fear from his supposed teammates rolling off his rigid shoulders. 

Black Widow managed to close the portal following Dr. Selvig's advice, though triumph glee was short lived. 

A nuclear missile was heading for New York City with the hopes of winning a Pyrrhic victory against a seemingly indomitable alien invasion. Nothing could sway its path or change its destination. 

Black Widow and Hawkeye died instantly. 

Captain America met a slow and suffering end, the super soldier serum could not counteract radiation poisoning. 

The Hulk disappeared from the United States and occasionally resurfaced in the remotest locations but Bruce Banner was never seen again. 

Thor, partially blind from the initial blast but otherwise unharmed due to his Asgardian physiology and Mjolnir's protection, returned to Asgard and sought its healers to mend his vision. 

Loki was defenseless and drained during the missile's detonation, he slumbered on in a recuperative sleep and would someday face trial for what he had done. 

In the meantime; however, Midgard was to be brought to justice. 

Thor's rage at betrayal from a world he fought to protect was evenly matched by Odin's fury at the harm done to Asgard's crowned prince. Though neither compared to the maternal wrath of Frigga when she cataloged the pains inflicted on her sons with cold and merciless eyes. 

The World Security Council greeted Stane with tight smiles and tense handshakes. Earth was in need of more weaponry and Stane Industries was happy to oblige.


	2. What if Tony told the Avengers the truth...?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Inspired by [AJM](https://archiveofourown.org/comments/113325240). (Assassination)
> 
> References/Quotes:   
>  _Avengers._   
> 

Tony woke up to the relieved faces of Steve, Thor, and the Hulk, and the strongest sense of déjà vu. "What? What happened?"

"We won." Steve smiled, bright and happy.

Tony wasn't sure if it was instinct or memory prompting him to blurt out these words. "Please tell me no one kissed me."

Thor's laugh was infectious and Tony found himself chuckling along without knowing why. The Hulk roared in triumph. Steve extended a hand and Tony gripped it, thankful that whatever nightmare he had been trapped in was over. They were alive and together and a  _team_.

"Let's find Legolas." Tony tested the suit and was pleased to find it in working order. Though the missing faceplate meant he was out of contact with JARVIS, a situation easily remedied once they were back at the tower. "Then let's just not come in tomorrow. Let's just take a day. Have you ever tried shawarma? There's a shawarma joint about two blocks from here. I don't know what it is, but I want to try it." The words fell easily from his mouth and tasted familiar on his tongue. He ignored it, refusing to dwell on the dark future he had seen, lived, or imagined. It had to be the portal messing with his head.

"We are not finished yet." Thor intoned, glancing up at Stark Tower.

Tony shivered, a sense of foreboding washing over him and filling him with cold dread despite the warm sun.

They made their way to the tower in silence, picking Clint up along the way. Natasha, with the scepter in hand, was waiting by the entrance of the penthouse.

Loki's smirk when he asked for a drink was as memorable as his words, both the first and this time around. Except instead of the answering grin that Tony remembered offering, he paled at yet another event unfolding exactly the way he knew.

It must be a coincidence, it had to be. Because Tony refused to believe  _that_  was what his future holds for him, betrayals and lies and pain. He told himself that he wasn't in denial.

*

Tony kept up a stream of chatter as the Avengers trudged through the aftermath of the invasion to shawarma, determined to drown out the voice in his mind screaming in panic. As Howard had taught him,  _Stark men are made of iron and laugh in the face of fear_. The best way to shut down an unhelpful line of thinking was to trivialize it. Tony was an expert at that, having made enough jokes about his  _heart condition_  whenever attention was drawn to the arc reactor.

"I saw some crazy stuff in that portal. Let me tell you. Alien armies and some weird vision of a dystopian future straight out of a young adult novel." Tony snorted. "Stuff you would not believe. Like, HYDRA is still around? Project Insight? Triskelion? Lame!" He thought he saw Natasha and Clint exchange alarmed glances but when he turned to face them, both agents only looked amused.

"HYDRA is long gone." Steve stated with finality, frowning with disapproval. "I saw to that personally."

Tony wisely kept the tidbit of Bucky Barnes being the Winter Soldier to himself. It wouldn't do to upset Steve with some crazy manifestation of Tony's mind, nor would it help Tony's mental state to think of the Winter Soldier and what he had done.  _Who he had killed_.

The meal was delicious in that exaggerated way after a near-death experience. Tony devoured every bite, eager to shut off his overactive brain with a hefty dose of dopamine via food. He ended up eating most of Natasha's plate because fatigue affected her appetite. Clint left most of his unfinished too.

*

The trepidation returned with a vengeance the next morning as the Avengers sent Thor and Loki back to Asgard via the Tesseract. Everything played out as Tony remembered, Steve's plan to see the country and Bruce's desire to check in on patients in India, except he shouldn't have those memories. If he could even call them that. 

Tony was startled, then relieved, when Natasha approached him as they were heading their separate ways, because it broke the sequence of events.

"Hey Stark." Natasha bumped her shoulder against his in a rare act of camaraderie Tony hadn't experienced before. "Got a second to swing by SHIELD with us? It's time to get you upgraded to full-time Avenger and have a tour of the place."

Tony stifled a grin and slid on an expression of indifference. "I suppose." He quirked an eyebrow at her. "What happened to  _Iron Man, yes; Tony Stark, not recommended_?"

"You flying a nuke into an alien portal." Natasha replied coolly.

"Damn straight." Tony called for Bruce and threw the car keys at the other scientist when he turned. "Take the car, Brucie. Just leave it at the airport. I'll get a ride back with Mr. and Mrs. Smith here."

Bruce caught the keys with a frown of confusion but nodded in acceptance of the change in plans. 

*

SHIELD had no interest in making Tony an Avenger, or if they did, it was shoved aside in favor of getting as much information out of him as possible about the supposed  _premonition_. He had scoffed at first, asking if this was some sort of initiation or prank, the two broken fingers answered that question succinctly.

The sheer nervous intensity in the room told Tony everything he needed to know. SHIELD would only be this uneasy if there was truth to what Tony had said. He tested his theory by dropping names and dates, gauging reactions as he went. While he wasn't a spy, he had spent years negotiating with less-than-reputable businessmen and knew body language as well as he did English, Japanese, French, and Russian.

Pierce's quicker-than-usual blink when Tony had mentioned the Winter Soldier confirmed Bucky Barnes and HYDRA's existence in this new century.

It was real. It was all real.

Tony laughed, harsh and strident. It sounded like a scream. Somehow, he'd managed to screw up the second chance the universe handed to him by trusting the wrong people  _again_. "I'm not telling you shit." He snarled, feeling pleased when he saw Natasha's narrowed eyes ease. If he had cooperated easily, it could raise suspicion. He would wait for them to offer him the right incentive to be SHIELD's, and HYDRA's, magic eight ball.

On the third day, they brought in photos of Pepper, Rhodey, and Happy. Romanoff's fingerprints were all over it, even though it was presented by Barton's hands, who at least had the decency to look apologetic when he told Tony that he had orders to eliminate these targets within the hour but would hate to carry them out. "Help me help them, man." He had begged, though the fact that he would have followed through if Tony didn't' cooperate negated the plea. 

It was one hell of an incentive, the one Tony had been waiting for before he rained down  _hell_  on their traitorous heads. "Stay the hell away from my  _family_. If you hurt any of them, no  _farm_  will be remote enough to hide yours from me." He said through gritted teeth, vindictively pleased when Barton reared back. Excellent. That little jab served its purpose of driving the point home that Tony was  _valuable_  in his knowledge and had the bonus of unnerving Barton. "I'm not talking to any of you backstabbers. Tell Pierce to get his secretarial ass down here." 

*

Rogers was eliminated by an exploding bullet to the head. Super soldier serum was not potent enough to regrow a head. 

Tony watched it from his workshop, with gleaming teeth revealed by a serrated smile. JARVIS considerately retrieved footage from all available sources and different angles. 

Captain America served better as a memory, easily manipulated to influence agendas and less likely to disrupt international treaties. The World Security Council had no qualms about threat removal. 

The Winter Soldier was seen fleeing the scene. He predictably resisted arrest and the officers were forced to use deadly force. The metal arm rested on Tony's work table, ready to be assessed and improved as Pierce saw fit.

Tony hadn't seen Fury, Romanoff, or Barton since the first week and he doubted they were still around to be seen.

The Maximoff twins had been wiped after making an attempt on Tony's life the first time he stepped foot into the bunker dedicated to the study and utilization of the scepter. Tony's usefulness outweighed their vendetta, especially when Tony disclosed the tenuous control Wanda held over her powers. A mindless drone void of emotional instability was more preferable. 

It had been a productive year in HYDRA's employ, though Tony maintained the illusion that he was a SHIELD operative. After all, it would be unwise to announce to the world that Iron Man was a villain even though he had never called himself a hero.


	3. What if Tony took control of the Winter Soldier...?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Inspired by [WillJ](http://archiveofourown.org/comments/114286008). (Major Character Death)
> 
> References/Quotes:   
>  _Iron Man 2. Iron Man 3. Captain America: Winter Soldier. Captain America: Civil War._

Tony bided his time with the Avengers.

At first, it was to ascertain what the hell had happened to him, from dying in Siberia to waking in New York. The team behaved exactly as Tony remembered, the shawarma was eaten in silence and none of the Avengers ended up moving into the tower despite crashing there the first night. Tony was troubled by their repeated rejection but wasn't as devastated as he had been the first time.

Then, once he was sure what had happened to him,  _for him_ , was unlikely to reverse itself, he observed his so-called teammates carefully. He had thought their fall-out was because of him.  _Iron Man, yes; Tony Stark, not recommended_. Hindsight made him second-guess his actions and reactions and casting every move he had made in an ominous and egoistical light. Experiencing everything again, however, changed his perception.

Tony owed them  _nothing_.

When the Mandarin attacked, Tony reached out to the Avengers. Bruce didn't pick up his phone. Thor was in Asgard. Steve answered but told Tony he was in the middle of a run and would call back later, which he never did. Natasha took his request for help as incompetence and mocked him as such. Clint said he was on vacation, likely with his secret family no one was supposed to know about, and Tony remembered with a startling clarity how Clint had abandoned his wife and children as soon as Steve had called. In the end, Tony handled Killian and his army of fiery soldiers. Without the Avengers.

Strike one.

SHIELD fell and Tony had an active feed to the security cameras inside the Triskelion. JARVIS patched a call to the phone next to the computer Natasha was using to offload all of SHIELD's, and HYDRA's, data. She had picked up after ignoring the call twice in a row. The eye roll when she heard Tony's voice on the other end told him everything he wanted to know. Yet he still offered to help with their technical issue only to be told to stop trying to inflate his ego by inserting himself in places he had no right to be. Thankfully, JARVIS had locked down the innocent agents' data while Natasha was distracted by the call.

Strike two.

Tony and Steve met up at a pizzeria in Brooklyn that somehow survived the economic changes of the last seventy years. According to Steve, the sauce was exactly the same as when he had it as a child. Seeing the opportunity, Tony shared his own childhood and spoke candidly about how his parents'  _car accident_  had devastated him and the unresolved grief haunted him to this day. Steve fidgeted uncomfortably before abruptly changing the subject to how dangerous cars were and the importance of seatbelt safety. Steve knew, he had known  _who_ had happened to Tony's parents  _for two years_  and said nothing. Tony pasted a look of interest on his face as Steve babbled his new friend Sharon.

Strike three.

That night, while Tony slept the first rest night of sleep of his life, JARVIS dutifully scoured all available footage, both governmental and personal, to locate the Winter Soldier; with multiple algorithms running in the background to hack into the computer and audio-visual system of a HYDRA bunker in Siberia. When Tony woke, JARVIS had located Barnes in Los Angeles via a vlog posted by an aspiring actress on her social media account.

The suit shortened the six-hour flight to three.

"Hi, Barnes." Tony greeted the startled ex-HYDRA soldier. "Bye, Barnes." He wiggled his fingers in a mocking wave before reciting a list of Russian words that had haunted his memories since Berlin. His accent was perfect.

They traveled back to New York on a Stark private jet then drove to Brooklyn immediately after landing.

Steve answered the door with a frown of annoyance at the unannounced visit that quickly shifted to elated joy tinged with deep suspicion and a hint of guilt at the sight of Barnes and Tony together.

"Move." Tony shoved his way into the small apartment, turning to face the two super soldiers as the door clicked closed. He looked into the blue eyes of Captain America and felt a moment of  _sentimentality_ that prompted him to offer a fourth chance. "I will ask you this once and only once, how did my parents die?"

Steve clenched his jaw and fists, positioning himself in front of Barnes as if to shield him. Protecting the brainwashed super soldier in case the unarmed human tried to attack. Predictable. "It wasn't him, Tony."

Those same words ignited a rage so furiously hot that Tony felt his skin sizzle with it. "Wrong answer." He took a step forward, still clad only in jeans and a hoodie, and cursed the desperate hope in his heart that made him offer this fifth chance. If Steve would stand down, then they could still work this out somehow.

"Get out of here!"  _Rogers_  pushed Barnes to the door, stance defensive and posture offensive.

"Wrong again." Tony snapped before switching to flawless Russian, he was a genius and picking up a new language was nothing more than a day's work. " _Eliminate this man the same way you had dispatched Howard and Maria Stark_."

The change was immediate. Barnes went from a docile sheep to deadly assassin, the metal arm shooting out like a bullet and gripped Rogers' throat in a choking squeeze, crushing the windpipe and cutting off any chance of Rogers breaking through the conditioning through the  _purity_  of their friendship. Tony rolled his eyes at that. Barnes then set to pummel Rogers' face until none of the boyish features remained.

Tony pushed off of the wall, where he had been standing to keep out of the fray. He paced over, like a predator on the hunt, to where Rogers lied prone on the bloodied floor. Barnes pinned him in place with a boot at his neck. "How does it feel?" Tony asked. "To be beaten then killed by a man wearing your friend's face?"

Rogers wheezed, somehow still alive and conscious. Tony reluctantly gave Howard some credit for creating a masterpiece of super soldier serum.

"Does knowing  _it wasn't him_ somehow magically take the pain away? Make it all better?" Tony grinned, serrated and vicious. He handed Barnes a gun with a high-tech suppressor, hidden underneath the baggy hoodie, and switched to Russian.  _"Shoot him in the head."_

Tony was thankful for his eidetic memory, for he would always remember the flash of fear in Rogers' eyes as the cold metal of the gun pressed against his forehead. The gunshot was muffled, but it rang in Tony's ears as though it wasn't and drowned out the chatters of  _morality_ and  _trust_ and  _doing the right thing_  he had heard from Rogers over the years that hadn't come to pass.

Captain America, the epitome of goodness, was a liar and traitor and coward.

Barnes stood silently, awaiting his next orders.

Tony considered the scene before him. The red blood and the gray brain matter on the floor. There was nothing left here.

They exited the same way they came, considerately locking the door behind them. The clock in the car said they had only been in the apartment for twenty-three minutes. JARVIS greeted them with the good news of gaining access to the HYDRA bunker in Siberia.

Tony maneuvered the car out of Brooklyn and onto the freeway to the airport with the same efficient grace with which he piloted the Iron Man armor.  _"You up for another trip?"_  He asked.

Barnes nodded solemnly.

"Excellent." Tony laughed, free and happy and the tiniest bit crazed. "You and I are going to be the best of friends."


	4. What if Tony woke up as a small child...?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Inspired by [TheBlueMenace](https://archiveofourown.org/comments/121021686). (Kid Tony Stark)
> 
> Beta-ed by [totallynotevil](https://archiveofourown.org/users/totallynotevil).
> 
> References/Quotes:   
>  _Iron Man. Age of Ultron. Captain America: Civil War._

Even before his mind crossed over from slumber to wakefulness, Tony was already struggling against the restraints pinning him down. It gave away easily and softly, the slide of cotton against skin instead of metal against wounds.

He was warm.

The comforts provided by his surroundings only increased his panic, having no memory of being rescued or transported from the cold wasteland of Siberia. With a shout, he untangled his limbs from the sheets and propelled himself out of the bed and through the slightly ajar door. His legs felt wrong, wobbly and too short, but Tony didn't let that stop his sprint to find some answers or seek an escape.

Tony scrambled down the long hallway –  _why did it look so familiar?_  – and let the momentum carry him to the top of the staircase. He took a moment to listen for pursuers and sighed in relief when only silence hovered in this darkened house. Reaching out a hand to grasp the banister and to steady himself as he descended, Tony was unpleasantly surprised when his fingers failed to make contact.

He was short.

With alarmed yet hesitant eyes, Tony studied his outstretched hand. It was small and free of the many scars resulting from years of mechanic work. His gaze followed the trembling fingers to the tiny wrist to the scrawny arm and to the frail chest, where his heart beat a thunderous and healthy rhythm both from adrenaline and fear.

He was young.

The realization that he had somehow been de-aged –  _hooray for all those sci-fi marathons_  – slammed into him like a freight train. His already shaky knees buckled then the marble stairs suddenly seemed much closer.

Pain blossomed mercilessly across his small body as he tumbled down the long staircase, slender neck whipping back and forth as his head bounced against the hard wall and even harder stone. When it was over, Tony looked up through bleary eyes and would have screamed if he could pull in a breath.

Captain America loomed over him and so did his father, as both men were the center of a prominently featured photograph hanging above the landing.

 _Home, sweet home_.

*

When Tony woke again, he was in the hospital with Jarvis peering at him with exhausted eyes.

"Young Sir, you gave us quite a fright." Jarvis said gently, brushing back a stray lock of hair. "Whatever prompted you to rush out of bed?"

"I…" Tony croaked, his voice high like most children his age. He was four. "I don't remember." Not knowing should have frustrated him, but it didn't. "I don't remember." It was almost  _freeing_  to say those words. So he said them again. "I don't remember." Memories and dreams shuffled in his mind like a deck of cards and he turned each one that scared him facedown.

He didn't remember.

*

When Tony was four-and-a-half, he made his first circuit board.

It was easy, like he'd done it before.

*

When Tony was almost seven, he built a V8 motorbike engine.

The roar of the machine wasn't quite right but was comforting all the same.

*

When Tony was ten, he hacked into the Pentagon on a dare from some seniors at his high school.

If he happened to go straight for the hidden files of secret agencies, it was only because they were the most challenging to crack.

*

When Tony was eleven, he programmed his version of the global navigation satellite systems.

Howard scoffed but Obie was intrigued.

*

When Tony was fourteen, he was accepted into Massachusetts Institute of Technology.

Jarvis and his mother accompanied him on his first day of school. Howard was busy scanning the arctic for Rogers using the software Tony designed, delivered via Obie's hands.

*

When Tony was sixteen, he won the 4th Annual M.I.T. Robot Design Award.

DUM-E's first chirp made him cry; he told himself they were tears of joy but his heart felt like it was breaking.

*

When Tony was seventeen, he graduated MIT at the top of his class and met Rhodey.

He trusted the older boy immediately and actually heeded Rhodey's advice to stay away from the wild parties. He wasn't the least bit curious about alcohol.

*

When Tony was eighteen, he learned that his father had found Captain America.

Rogers was thawed out –  _not with a blow dryer as Tony and Rhodey had imagined and laughed themselves silly over_  – and brought back to the Stark mansion to recuperate and readjust to this new world after being under the ice for nearly five decades.

*

When Tony was nineteen, he met Captain America in person.

With his free hand pressed tightly against his chest –  _to keep the scream bubbling up from escaping and to protect…what?_  – Tony shook Rogers' hand and hated every second of it.

*

When Tony was twenty-one, he lost his father and the world lost Captain America.

Howard had been more involved with secretive agents and shadowy organizations since Rogers' return, and the two of them had been en route for an undisclosed delivery when the  _assassination_  occurred.

The Winter Soldier had appeared in the middle of the road like the ghost they rumored him to be, stalking toward the crawling figure of Howard and executing him ruthlessly before Captain America could recover from the crash.

Captain America and the Winter Soldier engaged in fierce combat until one well-aimed punch dislodged the Winter Soldier's mask then Captain America became Steve Rogers, who reached out to embrace his enemy like a long-lost friend.

Unfortunately, the Winter Soldier did not become Bucky Barnes and continued his brutal assault until he rendered his opponent unmoving.

The traffic camera footage ended with a single shot fired by the Winter Soldier's flesh hand, as his metal arm was occupied carrying Rogers' limp body away.

*

When Tony was twenty-two, he maneuvered  _Stane_  out of Stark Industries with a stunning combination of financial opportunities and devious blackmail of the board members.

Stane had raged when he heard the news, spitting obscenities and issuing threats. People tried to comfort Tony with meaningless words like  _Obadiah didn't mean that_ or  _Obadiah was just angry_ but he knew Stane meant every word.

*

When Tony was twenty-four, he held his mother's hand when Captain Hydra declared his intent for world domination.

That night, he went down into his lab and weaved lines of codes into a suit of armor around the world. It flowed easily from his mind to his fingers to his machines, like riding a bike when he had never learned how.

He named it Vision.

Because no matter where or how HYDRA tried to hide, Vision would find them based on an algorithm designed to root out individuals that were most likely HYDRA through calculations of variables ranging from academic records, financial statements, voting patterns, travel history, and family background. Tony compared the results against a list of names and faces he somehow  _knew_  to be HYDRA.

The success rate was 99.4%, well above the qualifying threshold to execute this protocol.

Vision would find every member of HYDRA –  _past, present, and future_  – and eliminate them. 

Tony gave the order and watched his drones take to the skies in a swirling swarm, as though a worm hole had been opened and they were what poured out. He wasn't scared. 

*

When Tony was twenty-five, he was sentenced to life in prison without the possibility of parole for international and domestic terrorism.

The Raft was pleasant enough, seeing how the United Nations built it specifically for him. It had state-of-the-art technology and around-the-clock monitoring. They would have been better off locking him in a cave because machines had always been Tony's allies, but he would cooperate. 

For now. 

His mother and Jarvis visited weekly. 

The guards exchanged constant looks of disbelief when they thought Tony couldn't see, whispering and wondering how this  _kid_ was responsible for 715,854 deaths around the globe.


	5. What if Tony woke up before going to Sokovia...?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Inspired by [izumi2](https://archiveofourown.org/comments/124139553), [EmuSam](https://archiveofourown.org/comments/124321554), [Abby](https://archiveofourown.org/works/10935840/comments/124528284), and [Taeryfai](https://archiveofourown.org/works/10935840/comments/125896989). (Infinity Gems)
> 
> Beta-ed by [totallynotevil](https://archiveofourown.org/users/totallynotevil).
> 
> References/Quotes:   
>  _Thor. Age of Ultron. Captain America: Civil War. Guardians of the Galaxy. Doctor Strange._.

Tony woke up with an awful crick in his neck, half-draped over the work table and half-dangling off of the chair. He dropped his head forward and groaned when the stretch provided some relief. The workshop was silent except for the soft hums from his bots in the charging station.

"JARVIS?"

"Good morning, Sir."

"Is it morning?" Tony yawned, rubbing sleep from his eyes and squinting at the time display. 3:52AM.

JARVIS drawled. "Technically."

Tony stood gingerly, his joints stiff from the four hours of sleep in an awkward position and the twenty-six hours of programming frenzy before that. "I had the weirdest dream." He said offhandedly, shrugging his shoulders both to loosen the knot in the upper back and shake off the lingering uneasiness from his nightmare.

It had to have been a nightmare, a product of an over-active imagination combined with heightened stress levels, topped with a healthy dose of his guilt/martyr complex and a splash of narcissism.

The things he dreamed about were absurd in the light of day or, more accurately, the soft blue of the holographic displays.

HYDRA somehow having Loki's scepter? Ultron becoming SkyNet? JARVIS...dying?

Tony swallowed tightly, hugging himself and rubbing his hands along his biceps to ward off the sudden chill at the thought. It had to be a nightmare. His subconscious designing the perfect punishment for unleashing a murderous robot was to take away Tony's A.I., his family.

Speaking of... It was ridiculous to think that his parents were assassinated by the Winter Soldier and SHIELD covered it up. Aunt Peggy wouldn't have done that to him. Fury lived and breathed deceptions but he took care of his own. Steve was physically incapable of lying.

Ridiculous.

As he made his way upstairs for the comforts of his bed, Tony vowed to never have BBQ chicken chow mein pizza again.

*

Tony pinched himself surreptitiously as they boarded the helicarrier.

HYDRA apparently  _did_  have Loki's scepter and their base was in Sokovia.

His dream was either a prophecy or a result of the constant calculations running in the back of his mind.

This scenario was one of the many possibilities, not in the top ten though.

Just a statically unlikely outcome. Rare but not unheard of.

*

The room was an exact replica of the one in his dream.

Tony collapsed against the door frame when the panic attack hit. He could not rationalize away this as another trick of his subconscious.

What the hell  _had_  happened?

What the hell  _would_  happen?

What–

His world faded away in a haze of red.

*

The Chitauri whale's maw opened and swallowed JARVIS' fragmented core.

Sokovia was floating among one of the asteroids drifting through space.

Avengers' corpses littered along a road Tony knew.

"You could've saved us." Steve said with his last breath, holding a metal arm. "He's my friend."

Tony clenched his hands and felt the bite of unrelenting metal instead, he was holding half of Captain America's shield and the other half was sticking out of his chest. Blood splattered on the ground, each drop an echo of a far more brutal impact.

War Machine crashed in a grassy field and a colossal Chitauri army flew overhead.

*

"What was that? What did you do?"

Tony blinked, glossy eyes struggling to focus on the angry woman before him. Her nails dug painfully into his temples from the tight grip she had on his head.

"Pietro died!" She howled and Tony could see the red in her irises. "You did this. You monster-"

A blur knocked her away and Tony stumbled further into the room, disoriented but determined.

There was a silver-haired man shouting words of comfort to the woman surrounded by red sparks. He ignored them.

"Peace in our time." Repeating the words he had already spoken once, Tony grabbed the scepter and smashed the glowing blue light into the ground.

A yellow stone rose from the shattered casing and hovered above Tony's waiting hand. Dimly, he heard panicked yells and frantic screams through the crumbling foundation and collapsing walls, but tuned the discordant sounds out easily.

The stone pulsed, once twice, when he cradle it with gentle fingers and brought it to his chest.

With a clatter, the broken scepter fell away as Tony's heart found a new light to guide his way.

*

The Mind Stone was lonely, it called to the others with a wistfulness Tony could relate to all too well and felt happy to oblige.

Isolation could drive a man mad.

*

The Time Stone practically leapt into Tony's hands when they located it in Nepal, its guardians fell under the sway of the Mind Stone easily. The eye-shaped prison cracked easily and the attached cord tangled in the wind when Tony tossed it aside.

*

The Space Stone was next. Its current location on Asgard was not the most accessible but the Time Stone changed that in an instant. In 1942, Tony withdrew a box hidden behind a sculptured mural of the world tree in Norway.

*

Knowhere was an interesting place but  _nowhere_  as interesting as the Reality Stone.

The red gem's hum sounded like a chuckle and Tony preened at the appreciation for his wordplay. He regaled his  _captive_ audience and the stones with puns while they waited for the Power Stone's inevitable arrival.

*

The Guardians of the Galaxy departed happily with their payment, arguing over the best bar to spend it in and waving good-bye to a rather docile Taneleer Tivan behind the counter.

*

"Hi there." Tony greeted as a flame burst into his field of vision. "We've been waiting for you."

The orange spark of the Soul Stone filled him with a warmth he hadn't felt since Siberia. 

* 

Tony Stark was erased from the history pages. 

Elsewhere, in a space between realms where time was free to flow in every direction, a gauntleted hand - nostalgically painted red and gold and bejeweled with Infinity Stones - tapped against a glowing chest and considered catching a fallen god.


	6. What if Tony woke up immediately after Age of Ultron...?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Inspired by my many anti-Wanda feels. (Major Character Death, Gaslighting)
> 
> Beta-ed by [Arboreal](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Arboreal).
> 
> References/Quotes:   
>  _Captain America: Civil War_.

_An empire toppled by its enemies can rise again. But one which crumbles from within? That's dead. Forever._

Zemo's words echoed in Tony's mind as he watched Rogers announce the latest addition to the Avengers roster – the Scarlet Witch. The Avengers welcomed her as if she had always been one of theirs. 

It had been a week since the Battle of Sokovia, seven days since Vision left for Asgard with Thor at Tony's insistence, and one hundred and sixty eight hours since Tony somehow travelled back in time.

A second chance that felt like a breath of fresh air after lying prone in a Siberian bunker where each icy inhale felt like a shield in his chest and every burning exhale felt like a punch from a metal fist. Tony remembered accepting that he was going to die alone, and in his time of morbid resignation, found comfort in the knowledge that Zemo hadn't won. Rogers had left with Barnes. Tony had no doubt their next move would be to free Wilson, Barton, Maximoff, and what's-his-name from the Raft then maybe meet up with Romanoff, who had disappeared after Germany. The Avengers hadn't crumbled from within, only Tony had.

Now he knew exactly what he needed to do to fix his mistakes.

*

Instead of voicing his distrust and discontent about Maximoff joining the team, Tony was cordial and welcoming. He could see in hindsight how his objections had furthered the divide between them.

"Nice work today, Wanda." Tony offered a high five as they walked into the conference room to review the day's practice session.

"Murderer." Maximoff slapped Tony's hand away.

As soon as their skin touched, Tony fell to the floor. His arm was still outstretched, but the fingers curled inward to form a claw, as if he was clutching at something valuable. His body seized, the tremors adding a warble to his screams. Loud and raw and terrified.

A sharp slap brought everything back into focus.

"Tony, you with us now?" Romanoff had her hand poised as though she was readying another strike depending on his answer.

Tony managed a jerky nod, not trusting his voice.

"What happened?" Rogers asked. 

"It wasn't me!" Maximoff sounded a bit too quick and too defensive. "I didn't do anything to him, he's probably just faking it." There was a glimmer of red in her irises. 

Wilson extended a hand and Tony took it gratefully, albeit a bit shakily. Romanoff gave him a small push when his knees buckled. 

"I'm just going to, um, go." He leaned on the wall as he hobbled out the room. 

*

"Hey Tony, you alright?"

Rogers' words were more of a statement than a question, so Tony nodded.

"Listen, I talked to Wanda and she said she didn't mean to hurt you." He crossed his arms. "She's just a kid and hasn't really learned to control her powers, not to mention her brother died three weeks ago. So she's on a little edge and didn't mean to, um, make you see–"

"Afghanistan." Tony interjected, rubbing at his chest absently. "I was back in Afghanistan. Kidnapping-torture combo meal, would not recommend."

Wilson winced. "Sorry, man."  

Tony shrugged, affecting all the nonchalance he could into that one movement. "It's fine." He glanced at Rogers. "It's fine."

"Glad to hear that." Rogers smiled, wide and earnest. "We need to be able to put aside our differences to work as a team. Just give her some time and space, alright?"

Wilson's mouth opened like he had something to add or to object, but he snapped it shut with a click.

*

Tony heeded Rogers's advice and avoided Maximoff as much as he could, keeping his mouth shut and staying out of her way.

It wasn't enough.

"Here." He tossed Romanoff a new set of Widow's Bites, which she caught without looking and slid onto her wrists immediately. "Should have a bit more juice than your boring SHIELD issued ones."

Maximoff eyed the bracelets distrustfully. "I thought you've stopped making weapons."

Tony flinched. "I…I just want to keep the team safe, better gear-"

"Gear?" Maximoff scowled. "At least have the decency to call it what it is, it's a weapon. You only make weapons, Stark." Crimson wisps highlighted the edge of her serrated smile. "Like Ult-"

Romanoff's yelp made them jump, it was so unlike the enigmatic spy. Strands of electricity crawled over her forearms and her fingers twitched as she struggled to slide the Widow's Bites off and throw them on the floor. 

"I can fix them." Tony said hastily, instinctively reaching down to pick up his tech and stopping mid-bend when red lightning flew from the cuffs.

"Don't touch them." Romanoff snapped. "Who knows she what did." 

"Um, yeah. Good point." He straightened awkwardly and took a step back toward the elevator. Then another. And another. 

"I didn't do anything." Maximoff hissed, low and petulant. "It's probably another one of Stark's mistakes." 

"Or another one of your temper tantrums. Are you incapable of letting go of your pettiness for one goddamn second? I've tried to be patient but I draw the line at you destroying my gear." 

"How do you know I didn't just do you a favor?" 

"So it was you." Romanoff scoffed. 

Maximoff bristled and the red sparks dancing on her fingertips matched the ones still firing from the Widow's Bite. 

Tony smiled at the ceiling camera as the elevator doors slid open silently and closed swiftly once he was safely inside.  

*

"I think I should take a break, um, from the team." 

Rogers sighed. 

Tony took that as a prompt to continue. "There was an incident in the common room and, well, let's just say it's better for everyone if I, um, step away for a while." He rubbed a tired hand over his jaw. "Or maybe permanently."

"If that's what you want."

Tony felt a twinge at the almost relieved note in Rogers's voice. "Yeah, it is."

*

The Avengers Tower was reverted back to its original name while the Avengers Compound kept its current one. 

Tony looked out of the penthouse and thought back to a time when aliens were pouring from a hole in the sky with an inappropriate amount of fondness.

Their one and only time together as a team.

*

"Boss, Colonel Rhodes, you need to see this."  

FRIDAY interrupted their weekly video call with a projection of the Compound's security feed, the footage was from five minutes ago. It showed Barton at the range, letting out a loud whoop as an arrow split into three to weave around the pillars then reassembling before blowing a small hole in the test dummy's chest upon impact.

"This is awesome! Tony makes the best toys when he's in time out." He beamed at someone over his shoulder.

Tony couldn't quite suppress the flinch at the casual way Barton described his resignation.

Rhodey growled.

On the screen, Barton lined up another shot but never got the chance to fire it because the arrow exploded in his hand. Blood red and fiery orange. He dropped to the ground with a howl.

Maximoff stepped into the frame, hands faintly glowing by her side with a look of disbelieving horror on her face. 

"Good thing you got out of there, man." Rhodey commented with a mixture of disgust and relief.

"You have no idea."

*

Barton lost all of his fingers on his right hand and sustained severe burns on his face and shoulder. His preference for sleeveless armor made him more vulnerable to the blast. The force of the explosion shattered his scapula and cracked his clavicle. He survived but would never be in the field again which, for a man like Barton, was practically a death sentence.

When Laura called to thank Tony for his help getting Barton into a therapy group and supporting the farm, he could barely hear her over Barton's rant in the background. 

"Scarlet Witch! HYDRA scum! Biting the hands that took her in, you gotta watch your back with her, man! Before she tries to break it!" 

"At least he's home, right?" 

"Yeah." Laura sniffled. "Yeah, I guess. It'll just take some time to get used to this new reality." Something shattered and Nate started crying. "I have to go, thanks again for everything." 

"Sure, call if you need anything else." Tony cleared his throat but his voice still came out choked. "I'm sorry." 

"Not your fault." 

Tony disagreed but kept it to himself.

* 

The Winter Soldier was an expert at evasion but no amount of skill could match the power of foreknowledge.

Tony shot Barnes with a tranquilizer dart as Barnes' head was bent to locate the correct key to unlock his small apartment in Bucharest. The metal arm added more weight than expected but Tony was stronger than he looked.

A plum rolled down an empty hallway, further and further away from a forgotten bag of groceries purchased by a man the neighbors never met.

*

Wilson and Romanoff met them at the front gates.

Tony kept his Iron Man suit on but popped the face plate open. Barnes was a heap of unconscious super soldier.

"Is that who I think it is?" Wilson poked at the metal arm.

"Yep, it's Robocop." Tony felt Romanoff's gaze like a physical force, heavy and sharp, prompting him to answer the unasked questions. "FRIDAY's been monitoring your mission sites and caught him snooping around the one in Berlin, followed him to Bucharest and now here we are."

Romanoff hummed, still scrutinizing Tony but without the heat in her previous stare. "Want to come in?"

"Not at all. I actually don't get my kicks from reliving the low points of my life, of which there are many." He arched a brow at Romanoff, daring her to comment and almost disappointed when she didn't.

"I'm right there with you, man." Wilson grimaced. "Actually, I don't know if the Compound is the best place for him with Wanda's powers all out of control."

"Steve said she was doing great the last time we talked." Tony left out the part that he didn't believe a single word Rogers said. 

Wilson snorted with far more derision than amusement. "Take him to SHIELD or your tower or anywhere but Crazy Town here." 

"Take him to SHIELD." Romanoff said brusquely.

In that moment, Tony knew that she, too, had known about his parents' murder all along. 

Good riddance.

To them all.

*

Barnes slept on in the Hulk Containment room. There was no way Tony would have allowed SHIELD to get their hands on the Winter Soldier.

Not with what was about to go down. 

"House Arrest Protocol." Tony watched the screen with a hand over his chest as FRIDAY locked down the Compound. 

The Avengers were gathered in the conference room for a team meeting. 

"What about that guy you know, Sam?" Rogers fiddled with the straps on his shield. 

Wilson shrugged, not looking up from his hands as he fiddled with Red Wing. "Maybe. He hates Stark as much as Witchy here so he'll probably get to keep his hand." 

Rogers' frown was visible through the video feed, though that could also be because Tony simply had the best technology available. "That was uncalled for, Sam. We agreed that it was an accident." 

"I didn't agree." Romanoff's casual tone belied the tension in her shoulders. 

Maximoff slammed her fists down on the table. "I told you I didn't do it!" 

"Calm down, Wanda." Rogers laid a placating hand over hers. "We know you didn't mean to do it." 

"No!" Maximoff screeched, red lightning crackled and Rogers pulled his hand back with a betrayed look. "I didn't do it, period!" 

The truth was, Tony mused darkly, she really didn't.  _He did._  

Hidden electrodes to induce spasms and Tony's excellent dramatic skills.

Heat activated overload and voltage adjustment to change the color.

Remote detonation and FRIDAY's constant monitoring. 

It was all so easy. 

Now for the finale, an odorless psychotropic hallucinogenic gas designed to trigger the fear reflex. 

Wilson paled, gripping the armrest. "Riley?" 

"Sam?" Rogers, with his super soldier biology, was not affected. 

"Wanda, you need to stop." Romanoff said through gritted teeth, eyes unfocused but fierce. "You do not want to do this." 

"I'm not doing anything." Maximoff repeated.

Rogers' voice commanding Maximoff to stop was heard loud and clear over Wilson's terrified scream. 

"She's not going to stop." Romanoff whispered before she launched herself across the table, landing two solid kicks in Maximoff's chest and knocking the other woman out of her chair. 

"Nat! Stop!" 

Romanoff continued her attack with a ballerina's grace and an animal's desperation, striking Maximoff repeatedly with fists and nails. When she reached for her holster, Maximoff's already tenuous control - made worse after months of anxiety, avoidance, and accusations from the Avengers - snapped.

The room flashed crimson with a wave of force that left broken furniture, crumbled walls, and still bodies in its wake. 

FRIDAY switched to another camera installed in the room, the only one that remained intact. 

It showed Rogers, limping toward Maximoff as she slowly pushed debris off of herself. His once blue eyes shone crimson and his gait resembled a man wading through the dark and freezing waters of a nightmare. With his shield in hand, Rogers raised it high and aimed true. "They're my friends, Wanda." 

"So am I." Red sparks flickered and died from her palms as she held them out to stop Rogers. The blast must have used up all of her reserves. 

Rogers brought the shield down with a sickening squelching sound, falling to his knees with his head bowed as if in prayer.

A loud bang echoed in the suddenly silent space. 

Rogers collapsed atop Maximoff, face turned in the aborted motion to look back.

There was a bullet hole in his forehead. 

As Romanoff dropped her gun, Tony finally let go of the breath he had been holding since he woke up in the past.

The Avengers were gone. 

*

_An empire toppled by its enemies can rise again. But one which crumbles from within? That's dead. Forever._


	7. What if Tony woke up on the helicarrier...?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Inspired by [Ash](https://archiveofourown.org/comments/129732231), [AJM](https://archiveofourown.org/comments/130678638), [Ds](https://archiveofourown.org/comments/132018708), [Peramia](https://archiveofourown.org/works/10935840/comments/137845974). (Major Character Death)
> 
> Beta-ed by [Arboreal](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Arboreal).
> 
> References/Quotes:   
>  _Iron Man 2. Avengers. Age of Ultron._

"...man in a suit of armor, take that off and what are you?"

Tony blinked and found the movement effortless without layer of ice caking on his lashes. His fingers felt warm and agile, unlike the frostbitten tingles he had resigned to after spending hours in the Siberian bunker. He opened his mouth and tasted only the sterile air of the Helicarrier instead of bitter copper. The words  _genius, billionaire, playboy, philanthropist_  rose to the forefront of his mind and tangled with the memory of the future.

A genius with machines but a fool with people. A billionaire wanting what money could not buy. A playboy left in a cold bed full of nightmares. A philanthropist making amends on behalf of those who turned a deaf ear to the will of the world.

"What? Cat got your tongue?" Steve smirked, a vicious curve connecting the All-American dimples. "I know guys with none of that worth ten of you. Yeah, I've seen the footage. The only thing you really fight for is yourself. You're not the guy to make the sacrifice play, to lay down on a wire and let the other guy crawl over you."

Tony thought about the one hundred and seventeen countries who he fought for and the team he fought against, about compromises and confrontations, about friendship and  _so was I_.

"Yeah, this is..." Bruce started the sentence like he didn't know how to finish it, letting it trail off into the tense silence.

Steve took a step closer, puffing out his chest and pulling back his shoulders. The star on his chest as prominent as the one on his shield. Looming over Tony. "You may not be a threat, but you better stop pretending to be a hero." The  _or else_  threat hung ominously in the air. "Put on the suit, let's go a few rounds." Or not. Steve was never one for subtlety, after all.

Dimly, Tony registered he was probably in shock. His joints locked as if he were back in the dead suit even as the goosebumps broke out on his arms from the sudden chill in the air.

Time travel...or the hallucination of a dying man? Did it matter?

"You people are so petty!" Thor laughed with his usual superiority that grated on the nerves. "And tiny."

Tony swallowed tightly as he recalled the feel of a steel grip around his neck and the way his toes scraped along the carpet desperately as he was  _strangled_  both with grief and by Thor.

A recurring theme, now that he thought about it. Strangling a Stark and beating Tony while he was down.

"Agent Romanoff, would you escort Dr. Banner back to his..." Fury started, ignoring Steve's harsh hostility and Tony's unusual silence so carelessly that suggested Fury was blind in more ways than his eye.

"Where? You rented my room." Bruce snapped. His skin, previously its normal hue, rippled green.

Fury tried to back-pedal, unsuccessfully and awkwardly. "The cell was just in case..."

Tony didn't mean to, but the bark of hysterical laughter tore out of his throat like a choked scream. How did he ever believe these people knew better than him? How did he ever crave their approval? How did he break himself all the while thinking he was merely bending?

Natasha sent him a dirty look, mirroring the one on Steve's face. "Now is not the time for your theatrics."

Almost on cue, an explosion sounded and the helicarrier shook violently, throwing everyone in different directions. The way they should have been instead of clinging to the idea of a team.  _A family._

"Put on the suit!" Steve barked over the blaring alarms, demanding something from someone he had just scoffed at as worthless.

_The suit._

_JARVIS._

Tony scrambled to his feet and took off for the lab, uncaring if Steve would construe his action as obedience. He made it to the lab after dodging agents and fire extinguishers, and walked into the waiting armor's embrace like coming home.

"Never a dull moment, Sir." JARVIS greeted.

"Turn up that engine! Number 3 engine is down!" Hill's voice was as shrill as ever. "We lose one more engine, we won't be in the air much longer. Somebody's got to get inside and patch that engine."

"Stark! You copy that?"

"Yep." Tony said with a gravity that didn't match the flippancy of the word, finding his voice at last in a past he had no desire to relive.

*

Iron Man flew high above the smoking wreckage that was the SHIELD Helicarrier. He should feel bad for the innocent agents on board but he didn't. This was a more merciful death than the one they suffered when SHIELD fell and their whereabouts were  _gifted_  to their enemies.

"JARVIS, scan for signs of life."

Even as he gave the command, Tony already knew outcome. No human could have survived the impact from such an altitude and the unforgiving landing on the mountainside. They didn't quite make it to the water, after all.

"With the exception of Mr. Odinson and Captain Rogers, no survivors." JARVIS informed him with a note of concern in his voice. Never judgement, always support. "I must admit I did not anticipate this outcome."

Among the jagged metal and bent frames was a path cleared by Hulk's rampaging escape.

Natasha's brilliant red hair was plastered to her pallid skin in an even brighter crimson.

Clint's slumped form sat next to her, seemingly unharmed if not for the pool of blood spreading beneath him.

Mjolnir crackled rhythmically with the subtle rise and fall of Thor's chest; the god was alive but unconscious. By the time he woke up, Tony would be long gone.

Captain America's shield, broken in half, shone in the sunset and reflected the fading light onto Steve's soot-smudged face.

Steve's eyes were accusingly wide and a steely blue that somehow remained the color of clear skies even at death's door...even as he slammed his shield into Tony's chest. "You could have saved us. Why didn't you-"

Tony cut him off. "Because this superhero gig...isn't about saving everybody. It's about protecting as many people as we possibly can." It was a cost-benefit analysis. He was always better with numbers than individuals and unlike Steve, he was capable of following through.

The boom of the repulsor echoed for a long while in the forest.

Choosing Bucky Barnes over the world was the wrong choice.

Choosing the world over the Avengers was the right one.

*

Loki was long gone but Tony knew where he would be.

_A warm light for all mankind to share..._

*

"Please tell me you're going to appeal to my humanity." Loki drawled as he strolled into the penthouse, steps faltering as he took in the scene before him.

"Nope, I'd have to find mine first." Tony, sprawled across the couch with an empty tumbler by his feet, offered a full one with a challenging wink. "Drink?"

"Stalling me won't change anything." Loki approached cautiously and accepted the drink, the scepter's blue light cast the amber liquid in a sinister glow.

"No stalling here." Tony shrugged and took a sip, relishing in the burning warmth down his throat. "Just some hard facts."

Loki tested the weight of the glass in his palm, seemingly satisfied with its heft. "Oh?"

"There is no version of this where you come out on top because you are not you." Brown eyes met blue with unblinking honesty.

"I know not of what you speak." Loki hid his flinch behind the smooth motion of raising the glass to his lips.

"JARVIS, deploy."

The red and gold of the Mark VII pod blurred to a fiery orange as it shot out of the elevator.

Loki dodged it easily with a tilt of his head, his grin matching the brim of the glass by his lips. "Is that all, mortal? The Chitauri are coming, nothing will change that. Certainly not your tricks-"

The pod veered around with unerring accuracy and slammed into Loki's head with a crunching sound that was more than just the cracking of fine crystal. Bones shattered and skin tore and Loki's eyes flashed green before his eyelashes fluttered shut.

Tony stood and stretched, padding over to the fallen god with feline grace. "Everything changes." He picked up the scepter and looped his index finger through the honing bracelet he had hidden in the bottom of the tumbler.

_...and then to be reminded what real power is._

*

JARVIS was a constant comfort in his ear as Tony shut down the Tesseract with a well-aimed poke of the scepter. It was all rather anticlimactic.

*

"You missed." Loki said before he opened his eyes, emerald green glittering through the mottled bruises and swollen lids.

"Did I?" Tony smiled. "Or maybe I just wanted you to bleed a little. You know what they say, if you can make god bleed..."

"...they will think him human." Loki finished without hesitation.

It wasn't exactly what Vanko had said but the sentiment was the same. "And there will be blood in the water." Tony made sure to smile with all his teeth. "And sharks will come."

Loki's laugh was a hollow one but Tony's once-upon-a-time words filled that void. "You underestimate  _him_  if you think he is merely a shark. He is coming and when he does, he will come for us."

"You have an army." It seemed fitting to return the favor, even if Tony was the only one aware of such an exchange. He tapped the scepter against his chest, where the blue light glowed much brighter than before, like an entire universe crammed into the space of a star, before extending it to Loki. "So, want to make him bleed?"

Loki's eyes narrowed at Tony's careless gesture then widened in surprise when the scepter failed. A feral grin tore across his aristocratic features, a contrast and compliment of contradictions. "What have I to fear?"


	8. What if Tony kept waking up in Siberia?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So...yep. Open endings are my favorite. >:)
> 
> Inspired by [Candyoranges](https://archiveofourown.org/comments/128111265), [Ds](https://archiveofourown.org/works/10935840/comments/141095571), [EmuSam](https://archiveofourown.org/comments/124321554), ["Make Me A Robot" by Tessa Voilet (recced by Flight_Of_Icarus).](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2F6Tb3zWTKg) (Major Character Death, Time Loop, Brainwashing)
> 
> Beta-ed by [Arboreal](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Arboreal).
> 
> References/Quotes:   
>  _Captain America: Winter Soldier_. _Captain America: Civil War._

"Boss?"

Tony blinked awake with a jerk and a gasp. The HUD's blue glow calmed his racing heart, as did FRIDAY's voice in his ear.

"Are you okay?" She sounded so young, so child-like, in her concern. "Your vitals are rather-"

"I'm good. Just needed a catnap." It was a lie but FRIDAY wasn't quite experienced enough to catch him in it. Not like JARVIS. Tony took a steadying breath and exhaled as slowly as he could so it wouldn't come out a world-weary sigh; he wasn't sure if he succeeded. "We here already?"

"Yes, Boss."

The HYDRA bunker was near invisible under the blanket of snow but Tony knew exactly where the entrance was, what the double doors looked like, and how much force to exert to pry them apart. His self-sabotaging subconscious must have pulled details from his eidetic memory, constructing a horrifying dream outfitted with convincing details.

His eyes and cheeks stung as he popped open the face plate to get a breath of that fresh Siberian air, any moisture instantly freezing in the sub-zero temperature and leaving tingling trails that pulled at his skin. He hadn't realized he was crying, that bizarre nightmare scenario his sleep-deprived brain had conjured up must have messed up him more than he thought.

The Winter Soldier being responsible for his parents' deaths and Captain America slamming his signature shield into Iron Man's symbolic heart.

Tony shook his head, this was no time to slip back into the trap of catastrophic thinking, or whatever his therapist had called it. Pepper had insisted that he sought mental health help after Ultron but no amount of counseling could have repaired their relationship. The day Pepper moved out was the day Tony terminated his weekly appointments.

They had tried but sometimes there was no A for effort.

*

Fear prickled at Tony's senses as everything he had seen in his nightmare played out before him, starting with Steve's terse greetings and Barnes' silence and culminating in Zemo's taunting speech and the video.

_December 16th, 1991._

"Tony?" Steve's voice boomed in the silence that followed Howard's pleas and Maria's screams.

In that moment, Tony realized that he had a choice to make.

To fight or to forgive.

To lash out or to let go.

To repeat the past or to redefine the future.

Maybe this moment, this turning point where the course of history could change and head down a different path toward a brighter future, was why some higher power had given him a glimpse of the future.

A second chance to make a different choice, be a better man, and do the right thing.

Tony took a deep breath then popped open his face plate, ignoring the grief churning in his chest and the rage twisting in his gut. "I- I know that's not you, Barnes. HYDRA had control of your mind." He tore his gaze away from the dark screen that showed his parents' final moments and fixed it on their not-killer. "I can help you get it back, I've been working on this device-"

Barnes' eyes sharpened and he took a defensive step back the same moment Steve took a protective, almost aggressive, one forward.

"Stop it."

Tony blinked at the accusatory tone, caught off-guard by their responses.

Steve shook his head at Tony's silence. "I know you're hurting but trying to manipulate Bucky with empty promises crosses the line."

"I'm not-"

"Bucky has been through enough already and-"

"I know-"

"-he's innocent, Tony. He doesn't deserve-"

"Will you just let me talk for one goddamn second?" Tony's hands flew up in frustration, the repulsors weaved brilliant blue arcs in the dim bunker.

Both super soldiers attacked at once. Steve's shield slammed into Tony's chest and Barnes' hands, one metal and one flesh, caught Tony's gauntleted ones with the same devastating force he had used to crush Howard's face and Maria's throat.

*

"Boss, we're here."

Tony woke with a gasp. "FRIDAY?" His heart jumped, a staccato of hope and horror.

The HYDRA bunker loomed in his field of vision. A sleeping giant of a nightmare that Tony refused to accept as a possible reality and in the rare and bizarre case it was, well, then he would fix it as he had done with everything else in his life.

A life that had been filled with broken things.

*

The air practically crystalized as he exhaled, white clouds floating in the deserted bunker like flags of defeat. It seemed fitting that his last breaths would be spent on admitting that he had failed and lost and fallen.

Flickers of memories, scrambled and spliced, played through his increasingly sluggish thoughts.

The whir of the mechanical arm. A video he had seen so many - _too many_ \- times that he had lost count. Barnes' narrowed eyes glaring with suspicion. Loud voices giving into anger. Red and gold, bright like flames and sunshine, and Tony just wanted to be warm.

Again.

Steve shaking his head without hesitation. The sharp edge of the shield. His parents' death confined to screens too small for his grief. FRIDAY's warnings, distorted as the suit's power shut off. His voice, begging for trust and asking for faith that Steve had already given away to someone - _everyone_ \- else.

Again and again.

Zemo's gleeful speech that he had memorized. An attempt to reason that never made it past the first few words. The weight of the missiles he didn't - _but should_ \- use. Super soldiers and their super strength. Metal groaning and bending and digging into his body.

Again and again and again.

Until everything blurred into a hazy mosaic of mistakes.

No matter how hard he tried, swallowing his pride and choking on his grief to spit out words of compromise, it always ended the same way: Tony crushed beneath the Winter Soldier's unrepentant fist and Captain America's righteous shield.

The arc reactor's casing was dented from where Barnes' metal fingers had gripped it as he pulled it out. Tony had watched his parents' killer throw away his second heart like it was worthless before falling to his knees when the flat of Steve's shield crashed into his temple. Then his world went dark, both from the blunt force trauma and lack of power for the HUD.

Tony managed to pry off the face plate when claustrophobia began to set in and the air became stifling in the enclosed and powerless suit. Some part of him knew he should try to get up, push himself to his knees then to his feet, like he had done countless times before and probably would again.

If only he wasn't so tired. A bone-deep exhaustion that left him feeling brittle as though he would shatter under the weight of it all and a backbreaking fatigue that had him wishing for an end to this downward spiral he couldn't escape from.

This wasn't a second chance, or third or fourth or fifth. 

Or one hundredth or one thousandth. 

This was his punishment, to play the role of Sisyphus pushing the boulder uphill only to be crushed underneath when it inevitably rolled down once more. Eternal penance for his hubristic belief that he could save the world. A laugh bubbled out of his mouth, along with the sharp tang of copper that he had become uncomfortably familiar with.

At first, he had kept trying. Going into the bunker when he could have walked away, believing that  _this time_   _would be different_ , and forgetting that there was no A for effort. A hard lesson to learn for a self-proclaimed genius that could outsmart gravity.  

Hope had long been replaced with doubt, then doubt eroded by a creeping apathy. Nothing he did mattered. He had run through the whole gambit of his considerable imagination only to arrive at the same uninspiring result. Even the most extreme measures - blowing up the base or flying, _fleeing_ , away - reset the cycle immediately. 

Tony's more emotional responses always escalated into a fight he had no chance of winning.

Steve didn't believe any of his offers of forgiveness or understanding, rightfully doubtful given the gravity of the situation, which was why he had kept this secret from Tony for years.

Tony tried redirecting the super soldiers from the bunker, but one taunting voiceover from Zemo had them scurrying to the Winter Soldiers chamber.

Any mention of the Accords and looking at the bigger picture had Steve scoffing at how spineless Tony was for bending to the will of corrupt governments while Steve stood tall.

In one particularly awful scenario, where Tony simply shrugged off his parents' murder with a flippant remark of how horrible of a father Howard had been, Steve had accused him of being less than human, more robot than man.

Throughout it all, Barnes watched it unfold with empty eyes that only sparked with life when the combat started.

_Must be nice._

*

"Boss, we're-"

"Here." Tony cut FRIDAY off with a hollowed chuckle. "Again."

*

The chair was a strange mix of imposing and innocuous, rudimentary design with crude arms extending from the cracked leather headrest. Tony all but collapsed into it, his fingers finding the grooves on the arm rests easily and his neck fitting snugly against the support.

"FRIDAY."

The Iron Man armor moved slowly toward the control console. In another life, Tony might have been impressed by FRIDAY's attempt of resistance against the override Tony had placed on her operating systems; now all he felt was irritation at the delay of his freedom.

This was the answer, he was sure of it. If not a permanent solution, at least a temporary reprieve.

"Hit it."

*

He woke to panicked voices and hands that were a bit too tight on his shoulders. He blinked and took in the man dressed in an ostentatious costume, noting with a detached interest that there was a bit of green in those wide blue eyes.

A loud clatter, followed by an even louder bang, drew his attention to another man, with a metallic arm, who was methodically demolishing the machinery but avoiding the red and gold robot standing near the door.

"What did you do, Tony? What did you do? Tell me!"

"Who the hell is Tony?"


	9. What if Tony woke up mid-Civil War?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Inspired by [lxghtwoodlxve](https://archiveofourown.org/works/10935840/comments/151900647). (Major Character Death, Superhero Registration Act)
> 
> Beta-ed by [Arboreal](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Arboreal).
> 
> References/Quotes:   
>  _Iron Man_. _Avengers_. _Captain America: Winter Soldier_. _Avengers: Age of Ultron_. _Captain America: Civil War_.

"...Congressional Medal of Honor which is one more than you have."

Rhodes' voice filtered through the thick fog of Tony's mind, memories layered over dreams until they became hazy nightmares.

_Tony, I'm flying dead stick._

Tony blinked and suppressed a flinch when he glanced up at the harsh fluorescent light, felt the luxury of his bespoke three-piece suit on his skin, and listened to the conversations around him with a mix of horror and wonder churning in his sinking stomach and tugging at his hammering heart.

"So let's say we agree to this thing. How long is it going to be..."

Sam was speaking, disapproval and distrust underlining his tone, the same one that he had used at the Raft.

_Look, I'll tell you but you have to go alone and as a friend._

"...one hundred and seventeen countries want to sign this. One hundred..."

One hundred and seventeen, a three-digit number that seemed too small to convey the millions of dollars of damage and thousands of injuries and hundreds of lives. How much red did they have on their hands and in their ledgers?

_We may not be perfect, but the safest hands are still our own._

"...play both sides?"

The Avengers were split long before the brawl at the airport, before the video tape and super soldier battle at the Siberian bunker. Or perhaps they had never been a team.

_What are we, a team? No, no, no. We're a chemical mixture that makes chaos. We're a time-bomb._

"I have an equation."

Vision was a constant reminder of what Tony had lost, yet with too many differences for Tony to pretend JARVIS was still around in those dark hours when the A.I.'s fractured codes glowed behind tightly-shut eyelids lined with tears.

"Oh, this will clear it up." Sam's mouth was moving but all Tony heard were Ross' words, the threat.

_It's clear you can't be objective. I'm putting Special Ops on this._

For a man of science, he was never very good at objectivity, always led by his emotions and chased by guilt. The press conference after Afghanistan, and the one after Stane. The creation of the Iron Legion, of Ultron, of the Sokovia Accords.

"In the eight years since Mr. Stark announced himself as Iron Man, the number of known enhanced persons has grown exponentially. And during the same period, the number of potentially world-ending events has risen at a commensurate rate."

_These so called heroes have to be held responsible for the destruction done to the city. This was their fight. Where are they now?_

The writing had been on the wall but Tony just hadn't wanted to see it, burying his head in the sand deeper and deeper until he was six feet under and inside a metal coffin of his own making.

"Are you saying it's our fault?"

_Captain America saved my life. Wherever he is, wherever any of them are, I just want to say thank you._

He wondered what words the public would have for them now. Gratitude wasn't infinite and hero worship had an expiration date. Tony had learned both the hard way. The Avengers' appreciation for the resources he provided became expectation over the years and it took the forty-something years of his life to outgrow his idolization of Captain America.

"I'm saying there may be a causality. Our very strength invites challenge. Challenge incites conflict. And conflict breeds catastrophe. Oversight...oversight is not an idea that can be dismissed out of hand."

_I saw young Americans killed by the very weapons I created to defend them and protect them. And I saw that I had become part of a system that is comfortable with zero accountability._

A full circle.

That was what it had all come to at the end, a full circle back to the beginning. Instead of missiles and guns, there was Ultron. Instead of Stark Industries, there was the Avengers.

"Boom."

The Avengers were both the weapon and the system, a ticking bomb counting down to midnight on the Doomsday Clock.

"Tony. You're being uncharacteristically non-hyperverbal."

_Steve's not going to stop._

Hindsight and foreknowledge offered new insight and Tony could trace all the mistakes he had made during this so-called Civil War easily, connecting the dots and finally seeing the big picture they formed.

The Accords wasn't enough. The Avengers weren't going to stop.

"It's because he's already made up his mind." Steve said, a hint of disapproval in his voice as though he had the monopoly on uncompromising stubbornness that the history books had lauded as tenacity.

"Yes, I have." Tony stood and tucked his phone in his pocket. "I'm retiring."

*

The Sokovia Accords returned to the United Nations without any signatures from the Avengers, which made it near impossible to enforce, nothing more than a piece of paper with some idealistic musings. All 117 countries withdrew their support and the document that had been the origin of the so-called Civil War became nothing more than a footnote in history books.

Iron Man had retired, citing refusal to fight against his teammates, despite their irreconcilable differences of beliefs, as the primary reason. War Machine, in what some called a misguided display of friendship, had followed in his best friend's steps. To appease the United States Armed Forces, Stark Industries reopened its weapons manufacturing department.

Technically only a year old, Vision had requested a postponement because he did not have enough data and experience to make an informed decision. It was granted after only a day of deliberation, likely because the Accords Panel was in desperate need of some positive publicity after news broke that Captain America, the Falcon, Black Widow, and Scarlet Witch had refused to sign.

On the day the ratification ceremony was supposed to take place at the Vienna International Centre, Tony received a videotape in the mail that he burned without a second thought, knowing exactly what was on it and why it was sent to him.

A Sokovian man was arrested a week later on charges of identity theft and credit fraud; apparently the real Helmut Zemo had died alongside his wife and son during destruction of Novi Grad. The news sparked a new wave of citizen outrage for those who would capitalize on the tragedy of others.

Tony sipped his coffee as he watched the morning shows' segments on how to secure one's identity, savoring the bitter taste with a smile.

*

Captain America, the Falcon, Black Widow, and Scarlet Witch continued to avenge injustices around the globe, be they corrupt governments, terrorist cells, or war lords. The price of freedom was high, it always had been, but it was one the Avengers were willing to pay.

The rest of the world, however, was tired of that high cost as the body count and property damage increased exponentially over the next few years.

For every corrupt government uprooted, its country collapsed into chaos and progress halted.

For every terrorist cell that went up in flames, the surrounding towns were caught in the crossfire and burned as well.

For every war lord defeated, citizens died for simply being in the wrong place at the wrong time and orphans wandered the streets crying for their parents.

*

The Superhero Registration Act was drafted with the intention to control and catalog enhanced individuals. 

On the same day the Superhero Registration Act was ratified by all of the world's countries, the Avengers were gunned down by a unit of elite snipers wielding long-range, high-impact weapons created by Stark Industries. 


	10. What if Loki's scepter worked on Tony...?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Inspired by [avenge_the90s](https://archiveofourown.org/comments/124347618), [Wolcen](https://archiveofourown.org/works/10935840/comments/131391498). (Major Character Death, Mind Control)
> 
> Beta-ed by [Arboreal](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Arboreal).
> 
> References/Quotes:   
>  _Iron Man 2_. _Avengers_. _Iron Man 3_. _Avengers: Age of Ultron_. _Captain America: Civil War_.

"Please tell me you're going to appeal to my humanity."

Tony nearly stumbled as he suddenly found himself upright and in motion, a vast improvement from waiting for the cold hands of death to take him as he laid in a disabled suit in Siberia.

_Red star on the metal arm choking his mother. White star on the circular shield crushing his chest. Two points of history shining in the darkened bunker like the most twisted form of celestial navigation._

"Uh." He blinked, eidetic memory and deja vu speaking for him while his mind struggled to understand. "Actually, I'm planning to threaten you."

_The only people threatening the planet would be people?_

Bruce's words, said at a time when that would have been the goal, for a planet's primary threat to be its inhabitants instead of another extraterrestrial enemy.

_Be careful what you wish for._

Loki smirked. "You should have left your armor on for that."

_Big man in a suit of armor. Take that off, what are you?_

A genius with machines but not people. A billionaire wanting things money could not buy. A playboy without proof of a heart because it had been removed and crushed. A philanthropist whose good intentions led to catastrophic consequences.

"Yeah, it's seen a bit of mileage." It had been a long road and Tony was tired of walking, of pushing past the pain to plant one foot before the other in a journey that led to nowhere. Stepping down the stairs to get to the bar - muscle memory - felt almost symbolic. "You've got the blue stick of destiny."

_The jewel appears to be a protective housing for something inside. Something powerful._

JARVIS. JARVIS. JARVIS!

"Would you like a drink?"

_Iron Man, yes. Tony Stark, not recommended._

The writing had been on the wall, distorted in the sweltering heat of Afghanistan and crystallized the freezing winds of Siberia. He had been against fighting forces of nature that he had no hopes of winning. So much for a futurist.

"Stalling me won't change anything." Loki cautioned, though it sounded far more like a boast, transferring the scepter from one hand to another with a flash of blue.

Tony longed for that kind of certainty and wondered how safe Loki must felt to be cocooned in his false faith. Ignorance was bliss and Tony never knew happiness but how he wanted to. If only he could stop his too-fast thoughts and let someone else tell him what to think, swallowing the lies instead of choking on them.

_Don't bullshit me, Rogers! Did you know?_

_Yes._

It wasn't the answer Tony had hoped for.

"No, no, no!" Living in a house of cards was infinitely better than having no home at all. "Threatening. No drink? You sure? I'm having one." His hand shook as reached for the crystal tumbler, fingers stiff and palm sweaty.

"The Chitauri are coming, nothing will change that." Loki paced over to the windows and Tony envied the confidence in the god's gait, the leisurely stroll of someone who hadn't been stabbed in the back to turn it so easily.

_You got to watch your back with this guy. There's a chance he's going to break it._

Tony suppressed the memory of watching War Machine fall while Iron Man soared the skies with a flinch.

"What have I to fear?"

_You could've saved us. Why didn't you do more?_

"The Avengers."

In another time, it was a challenge, a declaration, a gauntlet thrown. At this moment, it was an admission, a confession, and a nightmare.

Loki shot him a skeptical look.

"It's what we call ourselves, sort of like a team-"

_Sometimes my teammates don't tell me things._

"-Earth's mightiest heroes-"

_We may not be perfect, but the safest hands are still our own._

Except their hands were drenched in red and caked with dust from the damages wrought onto Washington D.C., Novi Grad, Lagos, Bucharest, Schkeuditz. 

"-type of thing." Tony shrugged as he picked up the decanter with a trembling grip, expensive scotch spilling down the side of crystal tumblers and making a mess; he was good at that and he made a mess of cleaning up too.

_There's no decision-making process here. We need to be put in check! Whatever form that takes, I'm game. If we can't accept limitations, if we're boundary-less, we're no better than the bad guys._

"Yes, I've met them." Loki's smile was as sharp as the curved blade of the scepter and his eyes were the exact same shade of blue.

"Yeah, takes us a while to get any traction, I'll give you that one." Tony eyed the honing bracelets and thought about the weightless freedom of falling, giving into gravity instead of fighting it. He did not pick them up. "But, let's do a head count here. Your brother, the demi-God-"

_This could've been avoided if you hadn't played with something you don't understand._

Curiosity killed the cat, it wasn't supposed to kill the cat's loved ones. Yet JARVIS was mourned as no more than a pet.

"-a super soldier, a living legend who kind of lives up to the legend-"

_That shield doesn't belong to you. You don't deserve it. My father made that shield._

The history books said Captain America was loyal and righteous and true. History was written by the victors and all Tony ever did was lose.

"-a man with breath-taking anger management issues-"

_I'm sorry. I'm not that kind of doctor._

Bruce's apology sounded a lot like Steve's, always with an excuse that put the blame back on Tony, who made the mistake of confiding in the friend who lacked the training or couldn't get on the same page with the Accords.

"-a couple of master assassins-"

_I'm not the one that needs to watch their back._

Tony had been so busy guarding everyone else's blind spots that he left himself exposed, trusting a pair of scorpions to not sting him even though it was their nature.

"-and you, big fella, you've managed to piss off every single one of them."

Just like Tony did, in a future where everything he touched bled and broke.

_I'm trying to keep you from tearing the Avengers apart._

"That was the plan." Loki drawled with a self-assured air while Tony felt like he couldn't breathe, a silver fist clenched around his windpipe.

_Help my wife. Please. Help._

"Not-" Tony cleared his throat and disguised it by taking a sip of the drink he didn't really want and only poured because he had done so once before. "Not a great plan. When they come, and they will, they'll come for you."

The Avengers would never stop, not for civilians, not for police officers, and certainly not for the rules of law.

_Steve wasn't going to stop._

Tony was willing to stop, was this why he was only a consultant instead and Avenger?

"I have an army."

An army Tony had seen with his own eyes, blinking through the glare of a nuclear detonation and doubting if aliens were even susceptible to radiation.

_We're the Avengers. We can bust arms dealers all the live long day, but, that up there? That's...that's the end game. How were you guys planning on beating that?_

"We have a Hulk." Tony's retort sounded strained even to his own ears.

Loki gasped with mock surprise. "I thought the beast had wandered off."

Bruce did, or would, but not quite yet.

With the tumbler in hand, Tony made his way toward Loki. "You're missing the point." He remembered this particular speech, it had been one of his favorite improvisations. The joy in delivering the once impassionate words, however, was long gone. "There's no throne, there is no version of this, where you come out on top." His entire life had been a downward spiral, a dizzying descent toward despair. "Maybe your army comes and maybe it's too much for us, but it's all on you." He and Loki, they were more alike than they were different, both carrying the weight of the world on their shoulders but Loki wore it with pride while Tony suffered his punishment. "Because if we can't protect the Earth, you can be damned well sure we'll avenge it."

Loki stalked closer, long strides infused with feline grace. "How will your friends-"

_So was I._

"-have time for me-" He raised the scepter and Tony knew what was coming, felt it in the center of his chest where the arc reactor resided. "-when they're so busy fighting you?"

Brown eyes met blue ones and for one fleeting moment, Tony was startled, then relieved, to note that there was no speck of green in them at all.

Flawless.

Tony swayed, just an inch or so to the right, and felt the pointed tip of the scepter sank into soft cotton and willing flesh.

Then, everything went blissfully numb.

*

The SHIELD quinjet exploded midair, pieces of metal and flesh sailing outward like the most grotesque firework. Iron Man caught Captain America's shield as it spun through the air, testing its weight in his gauntleted hands before throwing it to Loki.

Who caught it with ease and used it to block a hit from Thor's hammer, his other hand driving the scepter forward. Thor's blue eyes glowed brighter as he sank to his knees, his weight dragged down by the impossible weight of Mjolnir, no longer worthy to wield it.

A streak of red and gold sailed through the New York skyline, clear and safe for the last time, before landing next to Loki.

The Tesseract's energy beamed into the sky, a brilliant key to unlock the horrors of the Chitauri.

Loki's wide grin was almost pure in its childlike delight. "They will all fall before us."

"It'll be one hell of a party, right JARVIS?" Tony asked, a carefree laugh in his voice that sounded too good to be true. And maybe it was, but it was better than the alternative.

"Whatever makes you happy, Sir."

**Author's Note:**

> [dls-ao3.tumblr.com](https://dls-ao3.tumblr.com/)

**Works inspired by this one:**

  * [As the Father, thus the Son](https://archiveofourown.org/works/14182335) by [Kuro_Guardian](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kuro_Guardian/pseuds/Kuro_Guardian)




End file.
